Blah'sFebruary 3, 2009 8:12 pm
Been lazy to write lately… well, it is so obvious, it’s been a while and haven’t updated this blog…Anyways, nothing really great happened to me lately…
(more…)Blah'sDecember 16, 2008 1:39 pm
I went to MTS a while ago, around 4 in the afternoon… It was a long time since I have stepped my foot at MTS, I can remember it was around April last year… Well, I went there coz I was doing a favor for a friend… after getting the information that Rhon wanted, i find a place where i can read the book New Moon by Stephenie Meyer... as I sit into the bench, i remember it was the same bench were ‘we’ sat last year… as I was reading the book on Chapter 15, the song ‘Sana Ngayong Pasko’ by Ariel Rivera was being played by a band in Taboan…
Sana ngayong Pasko
Ay maalala mo pa rin ako
Hinahanap-hanap pag-ibig mo
At kahit wala ka na
Nangangarap at umaasa pa rin ako
Muling makita ka
At makasama ka
Sa araw ng Pasko
Ay maalala mo pa rin ako
Hinahanap-hanap pag-ibig mo
At kahit wala ka na
Nangangarap at umaasa pa rin ako
Muling makita ka
At makasama ka
Sa araw ng Pasko
I can’t concentrate on what I was reading anymore… the lines of the song hit me… and I wondered if he would really remember me this Christmas… I paused and listened to them and tears are starting to fall from my eyes once again… I remember being with him on that particular night at MTS, he liked it there and that was his first visit there and probably the last… 
after a while i went back to reading… I don’t want to still think of him though sometimes it’s hard to control that one especially if there’s some good memories that are attached to the things or places that I have seen or been to… hay…. when will my heart get tired of him…? If only it was just that easy… how i wish….
after a while i went back to reading… I don’t want to still think of him though sometimes it’s hard to control that one especially if there’s some good memories that are attached to the things or places that I have seen or been to… hay…. when will my heart get tired of him…? If only it was just that easy… how i wish…. Well, i did finish 3 chapters of the book and when I got tired I roam around the place… it was really nice there… but i don’t know if i can still go back to that place… maybe one day… if this emo thing of mine will be over…. sigh
Blah'sDecember 15, 2008 5:23 pm
hay…. i still feel empty and lonely…. no matter how hard i try not to send a text message from him or restrict myself to view his profile, i just can’t… i missed him so much… and it hurts every time i see his new photos or any updates, especially testimonials that came from his new found love…. i feel so sad… thought i try not to act like one but i guess i am not good at pretending… i try to be busy but wasn’t successful in doing so… i still think of him almost every hour of the day… the memories that we had.. sigh I just missed him so much…. i’m wondering if he missed me too… i am so hopeful on the past weeks that somehow he might change his mind and would go back to me… but now, those hopes are slowly fading… the thought of it hurts… i try to go back to blogging again now… but all i could think of is him… and i don’t know what else to write… i have a few reviews to do for the past weeks but i got so lazy and can’t think of anything to write about that it expires… yeah… 5 or 6 reviews… hmmm.. sayang din… and now wala na tuloy akong opportunities.. hhmm…but i rarely go online these days… been so lazy… and i don’t wanna get tempted to view him even if i’m dying to see him…
and it hurts every time i see his new photos or any updates, especially testimonials that came from his new found love…. i feel so sad… thought i try not to act like one but i guess i am not good at pretending… i try to be busy but wasn’t successful in doing so… i still think of him almost every hour of the day… the memories that we had.. sigh I just missed him so much…. i’m wondering if he missed me too… i am so hopeful on the past weeks that somehow he might change his mind and would go back to me… but now, those hopes are slowly fading… the thought of it hurts… i try to go back to blogging again now… but all i could think of is him… and i don’t know what else to write… i have a few reviews to do for the past weeks but i got so lazy and can’t think of anything to write about that it expires… yeah… 5 or 6 reviews… hmmm.. sayang din… and now wala na tuloy akong opportunities.. hhmm…but i rarely go online these days… been so lazy… and i don’t wanna get tempted to view him even if i’m dying to see him…i try to get busy sometimes, go out… malling, shopping, meet friends, watch movies, read a book…. i was able to get him out of my mind for hours but when night time comes and when i am about to sleep, all i could think of is him…. just him… hay…. i just wish this all but a dream…..
Blah'sNovember 7, 2008 9:04 pm
PhotoMIAHgraphy is now Up and Live!
Yeah as what my post title says, PhotoMIAHgraphy is now up online… I have created another Photoblog again. Yeah, again! Why? Well, my other PhotoBlog has a lot of ads already and I want to have a Photoblog where there will be no ads. Simply Photos, no more no less… I will still be posting photos on my PhotoBlog though 
Feel free to visit and see my very first Gallery at PhotoMIAHhraphy.
My wish for now is to have my own domain for that site. I know my photos are not that great (mag-emo ba daw?!) but I just want to have my own domain on one of my Photoblogs. Wish me luck!
Blah'sOctober 3, 2008 1:30 pm
From Pagerank of 0 I now have a 
I never expected that this blog of mine would gain a PageRank, I haven’t updated this for quiet sometime. I really wanted my main Blogs to have a PR, well… hopefully soon it will…. I know I don’t have anyone following this blog still I hope this would gain a few more visitors too in the future…. 
Please visit my new site: Random Thoughts of an insoMIAH
Thanks!
The Diary of a Brokenhearted Fool
I am but a HopeFOOL one….. A Brokenhearted FOOL… A FOOL in Love… I am nothing but a FOOL!
You make me feel like one… I know you’re laughing your heart out now…. coz I’ve been trapped into your bait…. I listened to my heart and this is what happened…. I shouldn’t have listened to it… I should’ve not hoped that somehow, I still have a tiny little bit of place in your heart… I shoul’ve listened to what my thoughts’ conclusions about you…. but this stupid heart of mine couldn’t just accept and stand a second to those conclusions… and so it created it’s own world… a world where YOU and ME just exists… Unfortunately that dream vanished… and so are you…. It HURTS like HELL! I wanted to curse you! I wanted to punch, kick you! Shout at your face on how an A**HOLE you are! but this stupid heart of mine stopped me…. INSANE! Yeah, I know….
I think the only reason why you came into my life is juts to HURT ME… You’ve hurt me once and I should have learned from that experience… instead I let myself went into the same situation again…. I thought I was over with you…. then you came into my life again…. The emotions that I thought had been gone was awaken… It was just there all along, resting inside… Then, I let myself fall into your TRAP and CRAP again… I should not have listened to what my heart’s been shouting… I should’ve listened t my mind instead of my heart but I cannpt undo what had already happened…. You’ve Broken my HEART again, into bits and pieces… that I don’t know where to start picking up those pieces and bring it back to what it used to be…. The Hurt that I’ve been feeling now is twice or thrice as much as the first time you’ve hurt me…
I’ve cried every now and then just thinking about it… about you… I know how silly and stupid I am to have had believed that somehow you still have feelings for me…
I just wished I haven’t met you… I wished that I didn’t went to that job interview on that day so that there’s really no chance for us to have meet… I shouldn’t have met you that day… I shouldn’t be suffering in pain now… How I just wish!
At first you were so kind, so sweet and thoughtful that I have FALLEN IN LOVE WITH YOU… yeah… Accidentally! But things changed, you became cold and arrogant… and I’ve felt that I don’t know you anymore… or that was just the real you? That the thngs you’ve showed me at first were just one of your tactics… or I dunno… I can’t tell since you weren’t telling me anything…
I thought you said you Love me…. and what a FOOL I am to have believed that, with your sweet words and actions… you’re thoughtfulness and all…. If I could just turn back time to the day before I met you, I would! and I would change it so I could have not met you!
You just don’t know how much it HURTS… I’ve treated you well but this is what I got in return…. I wanted to HATE YOU! I really wanted to but WHY can’t I?? WHY???
In my ususal day, I tried to smile to cover up the emptiness and pain, I tried to laugh even if I was hurting inside… I’ve tried to be strong infront of everyone else but in the middle of the night when I am just alone, I cried… just cry and cry… cry my heat out til I had no more tears to cry on… You were so MEAN… the Meanest person I ever met… (that was my mind but my heart says you’re not, mabuang nako…) How could you do that to me?? I befriended you even if it’s painful I still do want you to be my friend… Then I tried not to talk to you and don’t communicate so that I can finally move on and get over you… Then out of the blue, you came again…. you’ll talk to me as if nothing’s happened…. and now that I’ve slowly moced on you came back again….and you came back again just to hurt me once again…. how cruel of you…. I just wish I can tell this all to you but I can’t… you’re creating a barrier again…. Are you HAPPY with what you’re doing? If so I just hope your conscience will knock you down….
Is that what you just see in me?? A kind of game where if you get tired of playing you just stop and walk out without even saying anything? Am I just one of the games you were playing?? How dumb of me to have asked this questions when I think I already knew the answers… but I just can’t accept it…. coz IT HURTS so much! WHy?? How I wish you would also feel what I’ve been feeling now… I just hope you’ll realize what have you done… I hope someday you’ll realize it… so that you couldn’t hurt anyone the same way you’ve hurt me…
I am trying to move on now…. I wanted this madness to end…. I don’t want you coming into my life again just like you used to… you juts do that whenever you feel like doing.. hay…. How I wish….. I want you out of my life! out of my system! I don’t wnt you to come into my life again and just ruin things… just like you used to…. is that a habit if yours already?
I WANT TO FORGET YOU NA! EVRYTHING ABOUT YOU
!! GOD… HELP ME….. Help me move one…...
Verse 1:
You always say that you love me
But there are times you wanna make me cry
I just try to understand you just because I don’t wanna start a fight
You know it’s you
You didn’t care
But then I still believe it’s not the end
Though my heart have thoughts of you
I just take it for granted
Refrain:
Now you’re gone there’s nothing I can do
And I don’t know what I’m going through
My world is empty now it’s just because of you
Chorus:
I promise I will never love again
No matter what will happen I’m just standing still
Even though I love you so I just want you to know
This time I promise you can never fool me anymore
I don’t wanna cry but sometimes I remember those passing time
So how can I forget your love and your memories
But the words that I promise will always stay in my dreams
Verse 2:
They say we need to love and care
But I don’t believe ‘coz it’s only a game
God only knows why I’m doing this thing
It’s just because I wanna be free again
And every time I see you I just try to smile
Pretending I’m alright even if it’s not
Because I wanna show you what is in my heart
To show that I can live even without your love
Repeat refrain
Repeat chorus
Bridge:
You’re the one who understands me
You didn’t even think what’s right for me
You could show me how to wait and cry
My world is empty now it’s just because of you
I don’t wanna cry…
Yeah… I don’t wanna cry anymore (with someone who is an A**HOLE! A person not worthy of anything!)...but this tears won’t just stop from flowing… I really hate myself for letting you do this to me! And I hate that after all you’ve done to me I still can’t HATE YOU, I wanted to hate you so that it could empower the LOVE I was feeling for you… If this is really love I am feeling or just STUPIDITY! I wanted this to end… I wanna move on…. please let me move on….